Over-analyzing Friendships

So I know I've been MIA on the blog scene... not because I havent had any thoughts :) because you know my mind runs at a million thoughts a second. In any case, I figured to play catch up, I can write a blog a night at least until I run out of things to say.

So today, lets talk forgiveness. So I had a talk with someone the other day. I guess before I go into the whole conversation my approach to issues is this. Basically there are 2 types of ways people can hurt your feelings. 1) They honestly dont know that whatever they are doing is hurting your feelings and 2) people know that they have hurt your feeling and they continue to do so... For issue 1, its easy to forgive... you feel bad, they didnt know, you address it and its all over. For category 2, when people know what they are doing/about to do is wrong and they still do it. I think that is the most hurtful thing someone can do. My way of dealing with the issue #2, is in stages 1) I analyze the situation. Could there be any possible way that they didnt know, (and apparently, I am pretty good thinking up situations so I overanalyze at this step). The second step is reality, I figured they did know what they are doing and they still chose to do it. 3) Is to come up with my own internal closure. For example, I realize that maybe since by default I always see the good in everyone, maybe I refused to see the big picture about the person and usualy, once I get to that phase I realize maybe the friendship is not worth it. Bear in mind that if I didnt care I wont even get to this phase. Anyway, so to deal with this, I assume the person is not who I assumed them to be and I assume the friendship is a lost cause and I end up extracting myself from that person. I guess for me its easier to deal with that way.

A new phase is sometimes when the person actually decides to apologize.. It usually puts me in a limbo what am I supposed to do with this. I guess I already put the friendship in a compartment and so now how do you adjust this.

My conclusion, friendships are hard. I recognize that people have to work hard to maintain them but in long run. And yeah the whole forgiveness thing. I feel like once I've dealt with my analysis, I'm done with the whole situation. I've forgiven them and I've moved on. I realize that seeing the whole world in a positive light is not always realistic... sometimes I need to be careful.....